24 April 2007

Pitchfork: Two Things

Two things about Pitchfork's Arctic Monkeys review.

The opening sentence
No longer can Arctic Monkeys be considered underdogs; given the notoriously fickle English music scene, perhaps that means they should be.

need something: a "though," "but," or "however" we think. After the semicolon. And, were the Arctic Monkeys ever considered underdogs? Seeing as how the next sentence, the very next sentence, says,

Last year, the Sheffield quartet's Whatever They Say I Am, That's What I'm Not became the fastest-selling debut album in UK music history, spawning two #1 singles and winning the Mercury Prize.

we think not. Call it "created mythology," "straw man," or "unimaginative 'journalistic' tack." No matter.

We think more strange is this ad:

Coors? Not even Coors Light (with the frost blue can liner)?? If marketeers think Coors is going to usurp PBR for cheap hipster beer of choice, then they've got another thing coming. Fool us once shame on you; fool us twice shame on us.

Coors has no cheap-but-funny slogan (c.f., Champagne of Beers); no Dennis Hopper endorsement (Heineken? Fuck that shit! PABST BLUE RIBBON!!); there are no great debates surrounding it (More taste? Less filling?); etc. And that can. The rich, creamy color of the can just serves to illustrate the watery, urea coloring of the beer it conceals. Coors? Fuck that shit!